CONDO CRAB
(A cumudgeon's take on paradise)
ELEVATOR MUSIC
Yes,we have elevator music but it comes not from the elevator. It arrives to my unwilling ears from a white player piano ensconced among the palms in the atrium. I hate that piano. At 5 o'clock every evening it starts up with it's bouncy tunes and continues until 9PM when everybody around here goes to bed. Why do we need that and why does no one object to it's insane optimism? On the weekends, it plays all day long and I want to scream. Look, I have nothing against music but not as constant background telling me how I should be feeling living as I do in this "Paradise". Besides not wanting cheeryness imposed upon me by those keys moved by technology, I wonder why, given the big fountain in the atrium, we should not just listen to the sound of it's water recycling back and forth. Water is like white noise. It doesn't suggest any particuliar mood and therefore is never in discordance with my temper of the moment. Water is good. Player pianos suck.
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